“Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a Judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.” -Albert Einstein
Did you ever watch The Twilight Zone?
I remember this one episode with William Shatner. He and his newlywed wife are driving through a town (ok, the Twilight Zone) and their car breaks down. While they wait for it to be repaired they go to this little café. At their table is a mysterious looking fortune teller machine. Every time they put a penny in they can get an answer to a question.
Every answer he is given proves to be true.
This thing might actually be legit. Can you imagine? Every prediction you would ever want to know.
The wife tries unsuccessfully to outsmart it. Then it basically tells them not to leave at a certain time or they would be hurt.
The wife convinces him finally to leave and they are nearly hit by a car at the predicted time.
This thing was right again!
He rushes back and starts to get more answers, asking questions about their future and that’s where she draws the line.
The wife convinces him to move on because it shouldn’t matter and that they can make their own destiny in life.
He agrees and they are able to walk away from it (and The Twilight Zone).
In comes a separate couple, much older, walking up to the machine with pennies and questions and getting disappointed by the answers. This thing obviously owned them for years.
You can’t hand yourself over to outside influence.
If you live and die from sources outside of yourself, you are not living authentically, but when you are being true to yourself you are your best self.
I was deeply inspired by this podcast episode of Social Anxiety Solutions with Dr. Demartini from The Secret and recommend you check it out. Dr. Demartini talks about using the Law of Attraction for things to align so you can be your best authentic self and attract the things you want. He says when we attempt to be someone we aren’t, we dismiss who we are and where we excel. We are comparing ourselves to others instead of aligning our behaviors to our dreams, regardless of what anyone else may think.
You already know you aren’t supposed to be comparing yourself to others or to do things so you are fitting in and saying the right things, but it’s always easier said than done.
I’m going to give you steps to start following your intuition so it can be like an anchor for you to be yourself.
We will walk through this step by step.
Now, confession, what originally drew me to this topic over the last few years was an outside resource (The Life You Were Born to Live by Dan Millman) telling me based on my birthdate that my purpose was to work through perfectionism and self-doubt, to follow the intuition of my heart and serve as an example of integrity in my daily life, and to find out what I really feel versus how I think I should feel.
Talk about a loop.
So now, do I do it because it told me to?
I guess the lesson is we should not take advice outside of ourselves too literally, or put it on a pedestal over ourselves.
You always need to come first.
Use all the information as a guide and let your own voice and heart make the final call with everything you do.
Get around logical thinking and get in tune with your own voice, not because it’s in the stars, a book, or a blog post.
Step 1: Recognizing the signs of worshiping others’ opinions.
If you are a sensitive person, you are attuned to your environment. You are sensitive to the good and the bad. You are sensitive to criticism.
You may have a heightened awareness of what others think (or what you think they think of you) and you may have programmed yourself to try to manipulate the situation to avoid getting treated a certain way. This is when you are defining yourself or your situation based on a perfectionistic standard or on how you think others see you.
You are at the beck and call of the wrong god basically, which is the god of OPINION.
This is when you question if you are doing things right and saying things right, all to fit into an idealistic standard that feels right and acceptable. But these are all still just made up fictions.
Action: While in the moment, start to answer to yourself if you are in line with your intuition and wisdom or stuck in the ego.
Step 2: Ask yourself if what you are doing and saying is true to you.
When you are in this state of pleasing others, you are open to being manipulated and to manipulating other people in a bad cycle. Remind yourself to pay attention to the difference between what is and is not true to you so you can more quickly identify it.
By being socially anxious, you have put that fear of judgment first but by focusing back on the point of whatever it is you are doing, the more present and in sync you will become.
Get more aligned with saying what is true for you and not be at the mercy to everyone around you.
Consider what are you putting over your own heart?
Action: When you do what you do, ask yourself does it feel like a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ and follow the yes.
Step 3: Stop monitoring the opinions of others
When you become the person you think others want you to be, you step away from yourself and you are then inauthentic.
You wear a persona.
This persona may have protected you but it’s not going to get you very far. If your goal is safety, you need to start aiming higher.
Don’t get caught up in opinions, but don’t ignore them either.
Use a more subtle approach, pay attention to them, let them give you information to take in and use, but let your own intuition make the final call.
What do you truly feel and what is an authentic action?
Action: When you feel yourself trying to be a certain way to elicit a response, stop yourself and realize you are worshiping the god of opinion. Continue to rely on your feelings and intuitions versus your head.
Step 4: Allow for you to be you and everyone else to be them
So be yourself and shine where you were meant to shine.
Let other people have their own opinions.
Let them be who they are and you continue to be who you are.
Not everyone will like you.
Don’t resist it, don’t ignore it, and don’t seek refuge or reassurance. Listen, acknowledge, and use the information in whatever way feels right to you.
In Deepak Chopra’s The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, he talks about the law of least effort. How grass doesn’t have to think to grow, it just has an innate intelligence to do it. The less you try to resist what is, the more in harmony. Intuitive and whole.
Deepak said when you seek to control others that you are cut off from love. You are cutting yourself off from the other person and yourself.
Action: Allow your actions to be motivated by love because your energy will snowball and can be channeled into anything you want (ie the Law of Attraction).
Step 5: Tie It All Together
To recap, you want to find and be your most authentic self who does what they do best and isn’t trying to fit into a standard. When you are taking actions:
- Get out of the ego.
- Follow what feels like ‘yes’.
- No more manipulation.
- Take actions based on your heart to generate a snowball effect of energy you can channel into anything you want.
It boils down to listening to your own voice, not doing things to please others, not running your life by committee, and not being ruled by false gods that serve the ego.
Pay attention to your voice and start to do the things in line with the real you.
How do you feel about this topic?
Now, let your heart lead you to the podcast I mentioned for your own source of inspiration.
Join the newsletter
Subscribe to get our latest content by email.